Kids say the darndest things. And my kids are abnormally AWESOME.


Would you rather be in a car crash, or hang out with a cactus?


Mommy: I'm going to be at school all day tomorrow, for 9 hours.

Brandon: Well it's better than 24.

Brandon: I'd do ANYTHING for them to make MarioKart 8 for 3DS!

Jackson: Would you clean your room?

It’s gonna be my dog. I’m gonna learn him to toot, and burp, and do crazy stuff.


Madonna (on the radio) : A material... A material...A material world

Brandon: I'm a Cheerio?

Brandon: What does the 4th of July represent?

Mommy: It's the day the Declaration of Independence was signed.

Brandon: Oh. I thought it was God's birthday or something.

Mommy, we should have picked a different day camp, you know why? I saw a girl picking her nose!


Hey, guys? Why do you need to know your credit score?

Brandon, who has apparently been watching commercials

Pleeeeease? I’ll scrape the gum off the bottom of your shoes!